Being in a 5 year long distance relationship is definitely something, most don’t even last for a week, some have given up on idea even if they haven’t tried it yet.
(Photo of Justin taken by me in Hong Kong)
(Photo c/o Justin in Tagaytay)
4. Learn your partner’s love language. You can give love but if it doesn’t match how your partner wanted to be loved, it won’t work. Do you remember those scenes from 500 Days of Summer when they differentiated expectations vs reality? It’s pretty similar to that except here you already know that you’re in love (why would you even put yourself in a situation like this if you aren’t). What we do is every new year, we buy planners to write our goals and expectations in our relationship. Sounds like an expert don’t you think? But it’s really helpful! For example, Justin writes “consistency” as his expectation. As a woman, we all know how difficult this is because we have our mood swings, PMS and the like but since he’s expecting it from me.. I’ll try to learn his love language. In return, I would tell him to be a gentleman, as an indirect reminder for him to always give me flowers because women always want to receive them but they don’t wanna ask blatantly.
5. Be firm on what you don’t want. If something’s bothering you always let your partner know. You can’t play mind games in a long distance relationship or else you’ll go bonkers. When I’m mad, I’m mad. I don’t care if it would hurt but I will let it all out and he’s absolutely the same (or more). It was an issue on our second year because when I’m angry, I keep it in (because I’m naturally like that) but he asked me to be angry with him when I am since he noticed how I end up hurting myself more when I don’t speak up.
6. Burn the scorecards. Whatever you’ve fought about last week must be forgotten once you’ve kiss and make up. It’s not healthy to bring last year’s issue to your current problem.
7. Find a friend who’s also in LDR and share tips with each other. No one can understand you better than a person who’s also in your shoes.
8. Be silly. We sing to each other on face time, we send corny jokes we find at 9gag, we laugh at everything. Although LDR is a tough job, don’t let it get into you. Just find your balance and you’re all set.